I did a goof

I’ve been working on a fan art painting of the characters Dream and Matthew from Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman, one of my all-time favourite graphic novels. I’ve made a lot of Sandman fan art, but I was really excited for this painting because a Netflix adaptation of it was just released. My plan for the piece was to have gold ink sacred geometry behind Dream, and I mixed glow-in-the-dark pigment with the gold ink so that it would glow when the lights are turned out.

And it worked! Until it didn’t.

I varnished the painting today, and the varnish completely smeared and lifted up the gold ink I’d used.

*facepalm*

Now, I’m someone who has a strong predisposition to self-criticism. My inner monologue (that a therapist who helped me very much a few years ago called ‘[my] maniac headmate’) loves negativity and self-criticism. Thankfully, I have a lot of practice now at not listening to the self-criticism and generating thoughts that are more kind to myself.

Honestly, I’m mostly just chuckling at this point. Just as a dream is ephemeral and fleeting, so too was my lovely glow-in-the-dark painting of Dream. Thankfully, I got photos beforehand!

I’m frustrated that this happened, but making art is messy, complicated, and mistakes happen all. the. time. I am thankful that I made this mistake today, so that I’ll know better for next time. This painting was just for me, not a commission or anything for sale, so I can still be proud of this work, if nothing else as a reminder that shit happens, and that that’s ok. I can learn from it. I can improve my practice for the next one.

Chickadee Valentine's Day Card

Check out my creative process for a digital re-work of an analogue piece!

Make handmade, one-of-a-kind bookmarks!

Bookmarks are something I really think you can never have too many of.  They make wonderful gifts (even better along with a new book!), and they can serve as fun surprises when you pick up a book that you set down a while ago.  Also, if you’re like me, you usually have a few books on the go at once, so there’s no way you’ll remember your place without a bookmark.

While you can use almost anything flattish as a bookmark, it is easy to turn a piece of paper or card stock into a completely one-of-a-kind placeholder for your next reading adventure.

What you’ll need:

Paper: I purchased a pack of Recollections 5x15cm pre-cut blank bookmarks at Michaels, but you can use paper you already have!  Printer paper, construction paper, watercolour paper, almost anything will do!

Drawing supplies: #2 or HB pencil, eraser, and a pen (ballpoint or a waterproof artists’ pen).

Colouring supplies: water-based markers, watercolour pencils/paint + brush, or coloured pencils

Lamination supplies: if you don’t have a lamination machine, a great alternative is clear contact paper (available at many hardware stores and dollar stores)!

Hole punch

Ribbon

Steps:

1. If not using pre-cut bookmarks, you will need to cut your paper to the shape and size you’d like. A ‘traditional’ bookmark shape is tall and narrow, approximately 15 cm x 5 cm, but this is your chance to get creative with shapes and sizes! Hearts, flowers, arrows, stars, triangles, squares - the sky is the limit.

2. Make a rough pencil sketch of your design. Don’t overthink this part. Whatever comes to mind will do! Plants, animals, favourite quotes, geometric shapes, random doodles, symbols, and letters are good places to start.

3. Finalise your design by drawing it in ink. If you plan to use watercolours or water-based markers to colour your shapes afterward, use a waterproof pen. I use Sakura Pigma Microns, but any waterproof pen will do. If you’re using coloured pencils to colour your shapes, any pen you have at hand is fine!

4. Add colour to your shapes. Let your imagination run wild! Here, I used watercolour pencils on the dry paper, and then activated the colours with water.

5. Let dry completely. Press between the pages of a heavy book (I used a dictionary) if your paper is buckled or wrinkly.

6. Laminate!
   If you have a lamination machine, you can simply put your bookmark(s) into the lamination pocket, run through the machine, and then cut out. Make sure you leave a 0.25-0.5 cm margin of lamination around the edge of your bookmark. This will protect it from the elements and ensure your bookmark has a life as long as your books!
   
   If you don’t have a lamination machine, fret not. Cut two identical sized pieces of clear shelving contact paper. Place your bookmark between the sticky sides and press carefully to get any air bubbles out. Again, make sure you cut with a 0.25-0.5 cm margin around the edge of the bookmark.

7. Punch a hole and decorate with ribbon. Honestly, this step is optional, but I like the look of the ribbon sticking out of the top of the pages.

All done!

I would love to see the bookmarks you make! Tag me on instagram @kivamariecreations, or send me an email at kivamariecreations@gmail.com!

If you are interested in purchasing any of my handmade, original bookmarks, visit my online store here!

Mandalas for Mindfulness - Part II

Welcome to the second half of my blog posts on making mindful mandalas!

Last week I talked about the basic process of making a mandala and some general tips of how to use mandalas as part of your mindfulness practice.

This week I want to talk about what happens if you get stuck. Drawing mandalas IS a way of making beautiful art, but more than that, it’s about retraining your brain to focus on the here and now. Focus on just what you’re doing in this moment instead of worrying about the past or the future.

But what happens, you may worry (we can’t help it - humans worry a LOT), if you don’t have a plan for your mandala and half-way through you run out of ideas? Sometimes my mandalas just flow intuitively and I have no trouble filling space. Other times I get a bit stuck for ideas of how to fill the gaps. So this is how I push through and finish my mandalas.

(1) Stop and take a break - but make sure you come back to it later

(2) Don’t be afraid to leave some white space

(3) Use doodle sheets for pattern ideas

I’ve collected doodle sheets by just looking at a lot of mandalas. I copy down patterns that I like and think I may want to use in my own artwork. Doodle sheets are a wonderful way to trigger your creativity and remind yourself of patterns that you may have forgotten and would like to try using again.

I recommend having a page or two in your sketchbook to collect fill patterns that you like. Then when you feel stuck, you can either look at them for inspiration, or close your eyes and put your finger on the page to select a pattern at random!

Above all, be kind to yourself.  The biggest thing holding you back creatively right now is probably the part of yourself that self-criticises and tells you that your skills/creativity/dedication are not enough. I am going to squash that right here and tell you: YOU ARE ENOUGH.  What you practice grows stronger.  If you practice being kind to yourself and mindful while you draw, your creativity will expand by leaps and bounds. 

Here are two examples of doodle sheets to get you started! I’d love to see what you make. Please feel free to send me an email at kivamariecreations@gmail.com, or tag me on instagram at @kivamariecreations! 

Nature-themed doodle sheet for mandala fill patterns

Lines and dots doodle sheet for mandala fill patterns

Mandalas for Mindfulness - Part 1

Mandalas are an ancient spiritual practice from Hindu and Buddhist traditions. They are circular patterns which, in some traditions, are ceremonially created and destroyed to symbolise the universe and the impermanence of everything. Today, they form the basis of spectacular art in countless media all over the world. From doodles to intricate paintings, from tattoos to architecture, there are limitless examples of the mandala as a creative outlet and a way for artists to express their connection to the universe.

So if there are so many mandalas out there, why should you make your own? Because the process of constructing a mandala is a wonderful mindfulness exercise. Mindfulness is the kind, non-judgemental observation of the present moment. It is much harder to do than it sounds. So it takes practice! In this post, I will show you how to get started with a basic mandala drawing. In later posts, I will discuss some of my more detailed drawing techniques.

1: Essential equipment

• a piece of paper

• a pencil

• a pen

Some non-essential (but handy) additional equipment:

• a drawing compass

• a ruler

• a protractor

I am a big fan of using what you have! You don’t have to wait to buy a compass in order to start drawing mandalas today. For example, this is a mandala that I sketched freehand in pencil with no compass. It’s not perfect, but it’s still a mandala. And it was a wonderful way to get myself grounded.

This is something you can do VERY quickly with almost no equipment.

2. Drawing concentric circles
Whether you use a compass or draw freehand, the foundation of any mandala is concentric circles. I like to start by finding the middle of my paper and then drawing circles outward from there. You can be very precise and measure the incremental sizes of your circles, but I tend to just vary the size and make them randomly.

3. Mark some quadrants

This can be as complex or simple as you like. You can simply mark the top and bottom half, or quarters, or sixths, or eighths. If you have a protractor, you could mark lines at 10 degrees all the way around the circle. This is just an aid to help you keep things somewhat repetitive and symmetrical as you draw your way around each circle. (Don’t freak out about my mass of circles here on the left - I got carried away doodling with my compass!)

4. Start mindfully drawing around your circles!

I recommend always drawing mandalas with pen. Yep, no erasing. This is because mandalas are NOT about perfection - they are about practice! I also think it’s really important not to spend so much time in a pencil sketch that your mandala ends up becoming a planning exercise instead of a mindfulness practice.

So here, with your pen, is where mindfulness really kicks in. Pay attention to how the pen feels as it crosses the texture of your paper. What does it sound like? Can you smell the paper/pencil/eraser/pen? How do you feel as you look at your drawing? Remember to try observing everything with kindness and without judgement. Your circles will probably not be perfect. You may accidentally smudge your ink.

I often start by drawing just a few lines of ink around my mandala. Then I start in the centre with patterns and work my way out.

4. Erase your pencil guide marks +/- embellish as you like!

I use waterproof pens to draw my mandalas so that I can use water-based paints over the top. You can avoid this problem by using pencils or crayons over ordinary ballpoint pen. Or just leave it without any colouring-in! Whatever you feel is right, is right. This one I just left plain as I love how it looks in black & white.

Finished mandala

Here are some examples of recent mandalas that I have made in which I did use paint to embellish them:

Lastly, here are a couple of resources that I have found helpful:

The Mandala Guidebook by Kathryn Costa

Mandalas for the Soul

I encourage you to create freely! You do not have to be an experienced artist to make beautiful mandalas. All you need is enthusiasm, some paper and something to draw with!

Kiva-Marie ❤️

Lessons from my cup of coffee

I love coffee. The coffee itself is good, but mostly I love drinking coffee because I associate it with so many positive things: mornings spent with my mum, conversations with good friends, tidbits of serenity in the chaos of a busy day.

I think we can learn from almost anything how to cultivate well-being in ourselves. Coffee is no exception. Here are four things I think we can learn from our daily cup o’ joe:

1) Take time to savour the moment.

No matter how busy your day is/will be, it is worth taking a small bit of time out to just be still and enjoy right now. Paradoxically, slowing down helps us perform better in our daily lives.

Sometimes, as a mindfulness exercise, I pause and do a quick scan of my senses: what can I see right now? what can I hear? smell? taste? feel? You can incorporate this exercise rapidly into your morning coffee. Watch the steam rise from the mug. Listen to the sound of your sips. Inhale and taste the goodness. Feel the warmth radiating to your hand.

Doing this adds no time, but certainly adds value to your coffee-drinking experience. Focusing on every experience in this way not only helps you to remember better, but appreciate things more fully by really allowing you to be present.

(2) Don’t overdo it.

One or two cups of coffee frequently takes me from morning zombie to semi-functional humanoid. Much more than that, and I get palpitations and upset stomach. We need to take in all things in safety and moderation. THIS INCLUDES WORK. Pace yourself. If you need a break, take it.

(3) Say yes to cream or sugar if they make you happy
(and to hell with anybody who tells you not to).

Life is short. Drinking black coffee doesn’t make you a badass, loving yourself does.

(4) Rituals are important - don’t skip them.

Making the time to do things that give your life meaning and make life enjoyable is always worth it. Don’t hit the snooze button at the expense of the rest of your day! It doesn’t matter what your little daily rituals are, they’re sacred. It’s the way you tell your body and your mind that you are valued and cared for!

- Kiva-Marie ❤️

Self-compassionate Mindfulness During the Holidays

Nothing will be perfect, so we can only do our best, and let the rest be.

The holidays can also be a painful time of year.  Relationships and pocketbooks are strained. Grief and loss are magnified. Days are short and demands on time are high.  Travel and visitors may amplify all of the above.

Mindfulness is one tool that can help us through the hardest times of our lives. A good definition for mindfulness, by James Baraz, is, ‘simply being aware of what is happening right now without wishing it were different; enjoying the pleasant without holding on when it changes (which it will); being with the unpleasant without fearing it will always be this way (which it won’t).’

I like this definition because mindfulness is about observation.  Circumstances can be both bad and good at the same time.  For example, during the holidays, we may relish the aesthetic, the food, the time with family, but this can feel drowned out by the busyness, crowded stores, relentless advertising, and overplayed holiday music. I don’t love Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas Is You, but it’s only a four-minute song.  I can choose to spend those four minutes ruminating about how much I hate the song or worrying about whether they will play the song again this hour, or I can simply observe that the song is playing and feel gratitude that it will end in its own time.  Perhaps the next song will be something I love! Or perhaps it won’t be, and I’ll choose to turn the radio off.  It’s up to me.

Mindfulness means acknowledging all of these pleasant and unpleasant things without trying to ‘fix’ anything.  You don’t need to change anything, for it will change all on its own.  This releases us from the burden to make everything perfect.  Nothing will be perfect, so we can only do our best, and let the rest be.

But what if, you may ask, mindfulness is just another thing I HAVE to do and the pressure to do it is just all too much?  This is why mindfulness also needs to be self-compassionate. There are three components to self-compassion that can help us through the holidays.

Firstly, self-compassion means being kind to yourself, and saying no to the inner monologue that tells you that you can’t do it or you’re just failing yet again. Treat yourself as you would treat a small child whom you really loved.  Give yourself comfortable clothing and nutritious and tasty food.  Give yourself enough sleep. Give yourself love.

Secondly, self-compassion means recognizing that almost all of us struggle during the holiday season. Those neighbours with the perfect lawn and house decorations? They’re probably struggling.  Your super-organised friend who has a colour-coded, cross-referenced Christmas shopping list that they completed way back in August? Probably struggling. We all hide our struggles, and try to project to the outside world the best image of ourselves.  Perhaps the neighbours with the perfect decorations are grieving the loss of their child who loved Christmas lights.  Perhaps your super-organised friend feels they have to get Christmas ‘just right’ because everyone is depending on them.  So if you feel you’re struggling, chances are you’re not alone.

Lastly, self-compassion means being mindful.  Yep, we are back to mindfulness.  Every time you find yourself getting caught up in stress or negativity or worries, gently remind yourself to come back to the present moment.  Find a tactile object that you can really focus on: a stone, a Christmas decoration, or just the rise and fall of your chest as you breathe.  Tell yourself kindly that it doesn’t matter that you started feeling stressed.  The fact that you brought yourself back to the now is a victory.  If you have to bring yourself back a hundred times, it’s a hundred victories.  You can focus on the now in whatever you’re doing.  Feel the smoothness of the paper you wrap presents with.  Smell the aroma of your holiday baking.  Delight in the sparkle of your Christmas lights.  Listen to music that you really enjoy.

Don’t be afraid to take time-outs from festivities with other people to have a quick mindfulness moment.  Go in the bathroom, close the door, and just sit with yourself for one minute. 

Keep things simple. Focus on what really matters TO YOU.  If cooking is really meaningful to you, take the time to bake or make food that you really enjoy.  If you don’t love to cook – don’t worry about it!  Take-out food was invented for a reason! You don’t have to do EVERYTHING – something is always better than nothing.  Perhaps you can host a holiday party and ask others to bring the food.  Perhaps this year, you need to just have a quiet day at home, and leave the festivities for another year.

Take stock of your values and needs, and then honour them. You are worth it. And if you make mistakes, that’s ok.  We all do, and it’s a wonderful opportunity to try again.

If you are interested in some exercises and guided meditations to practice self-compassion, I can recommend the following resource by Dr Kristin Neff: https://self-compassion.org/category/exercises/#guided-meditations

May you have a blessed holiday season!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year,

-Kiva-Marie

Merry Mindful Yule!

Seasons greetings!

Tomorrow, the 21st of December 2018, is the shortest day of the year here in the northern hemisphere.  For our southern brethren, it is the longest day of the year!

Here in Nova Scotia, where I live, tomorrow will only hold 8 hours and 37 minutes of daylight.  Many places in the far north experience total darkness round the clock at this time of year.  Reduced (or absent!) daylight is tough for a lot of people for many reasons: fatigue, cold weather and dangerous driving conditions, cold & flu season, vitamin D deficiency, and low mood (especially for those with seasonal affective disorder).

Yule is one of numerous winter holiday traditions that can help us get through the long nights.  Yule has been celebrated for thousands of years, and was originally a midwinter festival or period of time honoured by indigenous Germanic peoples.  Ancient yule traditions included animal sacrifices and purification of buildings and people by covering them with the animal blood.  YUCK. I’m so grateful I don’t have to celebrate yule in this way. 

Less gory yule traditions include:

1.       Evergreenery in the home

An evergreen tree can be decorated with fruit to feed fairies or forest spirits who shelter in your home in the yule tree.  A star at the top of the tree symbolises the five elements (air, earth, fire, water, and spirit). 

The yule log is another tradition in which a prime log of wood is selected for burning. Sometimes, evergreenery and berries are used to decorate the yule log.  Some people believe the log should be large enough to be kept burning for the twelve days of Christmas (impractical for most modern-day homes!).  Others think a piece of the log should be saved to light next year’s fire.  Some people don’t burn the log and burn candles on top of it instead.  In whatever way you choose to use it, the yule log celebrates the triumph of light over darkness, of good over evil, and heralds the return of the sun.

2.       The yule goat

The yule goat traditionally symbolises the harvest and fertility that the coming sun will bring.  Sometimes, the yule goat is pictured with St Nicholas, and may, in this situation, symbolise that the devil is controlled by a spirit of goodness and generosity.

3.       Wassailing

The most common type of wassailing is similar to caroling.  Singers would traditionally visit homes and offer a drink to the owner of the home from a bowl of wassail (hot mulled cider).  In exchange, the home owner would give the singers gifts.  Perhaps you remember the carol which goes:

Here we come a-wassailing
Among the leaves so green;
Here we come a-wand’ring
So fair to be seen.
Love and joy come to you,
And to you your wassail too;
And God bless you and give you a Happy New Year
And God send you a Happy New Year.

Another type of wassailing that I am super excited to have learned about, called orchard wassailing, comes from the west of England.  In this tradition, wassailers visit orchards in order to sing to the trees.  This blesses the trees for a bountiful harvest the next year.

4.       Feasting and merriment

Food is life.  Need I say more?

But, you may say, all of these traditions sound like so much work! Who has time to make mulled cider or go around singing to people? Isn’t Christmas enough pressure?  Are there special yule foods? What if I put the wrong thing on the tree?

This is where mindfulness can come to save the day.

Step 1: Pause before you act, and release what no longer serves you.

Think to yourself, what is it that I really love or really interests me about yule?  My favourite aspects are the nature-centred ones.  So when I plan my yule activities, these are my top priorities.  I am DEFINITELY going to be singing to my plants and trees this yule.  I’m looking forward to greeting the sunrise the next morning.  Additionally, there is a full moon shortly after the solstice.  I will be celebrating the last full moon of this year, too.

For you, it may be that gift-giving or spending time with your family and friends or celebrating with food are more important.  The tree may be an essential thing for you.  Traditions are only worth keeping if they continue to bless your life.  If your traditions are becoming a burden, maybe it’s time to let them go. 

It doesn’t matter what’s important to you – it matters that you honour it.

Step 2: Savour the moment

Sometimes we can spend so much time planning (or worrying) that we lose sight of just how lovely it is to have a day off and be surrounded by yuletide sights, sounds, smells, and those that we love. Take the time to breathe it in.  Relish the small lovely things and keep them tightly in your heart and memory.  The buildup to the holiday season has been given so much more time and hype than the actual holiday itself. This is precious time, and it is fleeting. My yuletide wish for you is that you may plan less and enjoy more.

As my yule gift to you, I’ve created a free downloadable yule colouring page (available HERE). Colouring is very mindful!

Blessed yule and solstice!

-          Kiva-Marie

Every light casts a shadow

 The past week has been a rollercoaster. I’ve never been on an actual rollercoaster, but if it’s anything like my recent few days, I am NOT interested.

The thing with rollercoasters, though - is they go up and down. That seems to always be the way in life. No up without down, no waxing without waning, no joy without grief.

I’ve been thinking a lot about my ‘shadow self’ this week. I don’t know if there’s an actual definition of shadow selves or not, but here I will use the term to mean the part of our inner selves (mind / spirit) that feels ‘negative things’. Things like fear, pain, anger, sorrow. I put ‘negative things’ in air quotes because all of those feelings are healthy and protective in certain times.

Times like this week, for me.

This has been a week full of good and bad. My brother and his partner adopted a dog this week, so I am now an auntie to a beautiful furry nephew named Zack! My products are selling (omgggg!!) and that means I’ve sold out of some things. Which is exciting and overwhelming. The big bad has been I’ve been feeling extremely stressed out about future / career things, and a sudden death in my partner’s family has shattered us.

Unfortunately, I am not a Jedi master who can switch off fear. My mental health problems mean that I am usually always afraid (read: ANXIOUS) of something all the time. So how, when so many huge life events converge, do I keep my shadow self from taking over my whole life?

(Not a rhetorical question - I’m actually asking.) 

My thoughts are that the shadow self is the part of me that needs attention and care. And sometimes care means laying down the law and telling yourself that actually no, you’ve had enough anxious feelings for today, thanks. But sometimes I think care can mean telling your shadow self, I see you. You are worthy. You are valid. And I am listening.

So I’m just sitting in my sorrow and uncertainty today. And telling my shadow self that it’s ok, brighter days will come again. ❤️ It’s the natural way of things.

Learning from mistakes

Trying new things is a great way to learn.

It's not always easy. But you learn.

One of my newest products is my cotton eco tote bag.  I'm not a super-experienced seamstress. So making 21 tote bags was a fun adventure. And by fun, I mean long and sometimes frustrating.

The first bag I made was too small. 

Then my needle broke.

Then I made two with wonky twisted handles.

BUT! I learned I needed to make them a bit bigger than I had originally planned and I absolutely love the bigger size bag.  Then I learned how to change the needle on my sewing machine.  Then I learned I need to pay close attention to the handles when pinning the pieces together so they don't have a twist in them. Eventually I found myself with nineteen perfect bags and two nearly-perfect bags. The first bag took me two hours to make.  The last one took about twenty minutes.

I think in life it's so easy to focus on mistakes or hardships.  Especially since they always seem to come in waves. You haven't even had a moment to catch your breath from the first hit when another one will bowl you over.

Certainly, some hard times will not have an 'upside'.  I don't think there's a silver lining to be found in every cloud.  But I think when smaller, everyday things like breaking a sewing machine needle or having trouble finding a parking space or losing your keys occur, before you start beating yourself up, just pause.  Reflect on yourself.  Is this really the worst case scenario? Is this something I could have prevented?  If so - learn to do better next time.  If not - there was nothing you could have done.  In either case, forgive yourself and accept that nothing is perfect and there's always something to be learned.  Even if the lesson is just patience.

new gallery!

I have finally finished digitising my garden series of mixed media illustrations.  You can see the gallery here!

These illustrations form the foundation for my upcoming Lessons from my Garden Art + Wisdom cards, which will be available in my online shop soon!

One of the biggest lessons I learned from creating this series is the huge potential for digital tools to help me create finished products.  The texture of watercolour paper does not seem to reproduce well in digital media.  You can see what I mean by looking through my Hamilton fan art gallery. Thankfully, I have been teaching myself (with the aid of some amazing youtube videos) how to remove the texture of the paper from my images in Adobe Photoshop, and convert my art into vector graphics in Adobe Illustrator.

This will hugely assist me in creating an ENORMOUS range of products based on my artwork. Everything from fabric to art prints to phone cases is quickly becoming possible!

Thank you so much for your continued support.  I can't wait to update you again soon regarding my artwork and small business journey.

- Kiva-Marie

Galleries go live!

Here we go, everybody!

I have posted two galleries for you with more to come soon!

The first gallery is my lavender series, with watercolour and pen illustrations of lavender plants, their care, and some of their uses. These illustrations formed the basis of my lavender zine which is currently available for sale in-person at Seafoam Lavender's Farm Store in Seafoam, Nova Scotia. The zines will be available in my online store when it launches in June (not far away)!

The second gallery is formed of photos of my Hamilton Fan Art Sketchbook. This was made as a birthday present for my partner Julianne. I used pen and watercolour on Canson 300 gsm cold press paper which I hand-bound into a little sketchbook. I am really keen to make prints from some of these pages. Let me know if there are any you particularly would like to see as prints!

Thank you for being here to see my work.

-Kiva-Marie

Coming soon ...

kiva-mare creations 

website, blog, insta and more coming soon!